What, when, how — I decide

Denise Tham
2 min readMar 30, 2021


One year ago, I became covid-unemployed. I felt hurt and lost, I was handed a ticket to make decisions. And decisions were what I made, plenty and over again.

Release or keep the grief

It is ok to feel the shame & grief. I gave myself time. Get the grief out. Keeping it create imbalance in our bodies and minds, get them out the best that I know how, without hurting anyone along the way. I wrote, connected to nature and talked to trusted friends. There are still layers to be shed and I am on my way as I decide to release.

Yes or No

When you say Yes to to others, don’t say No to yourself.

When you dedicate time and care for yourself, you are saying Yes to yourself.

Choose a No when you feel that balance is not right. Choose what & who to say Yes to.

Decide what support to build

Knowing changes is what I am facing during this period. I notice I fall off track, I did and still do. I lost sight of my Why. I chose being busy over getting closer to my dreams. I slowly build my support systems, ranging from a simple anchor, a painting and of course a musical.

🌱 “I embrace exactly who I am and where I am, right here, right now” 🌱 Hamilton, the musical 🌱 A lotus painting 🌱 How I release unsupportive energy 🌱 Who I ask for help

How I choose to reflect on this

I could had easily dwelled into self-pity, self-hatred, sat & sulked at my very own shame parties (been there, done that, may times). I could decide to stay in that pit.

What could I learn from this period and lift myself up? How can I use this to lift someone else up too?

How would I choose to see this period now.

👉🏽What a laid-off disaster OR 👉🏽 One heck of a Mega self-discovery year?

I decide what’s possible.